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introvert

This is my first entry chronicling my struggles as an introvert. I have quite frequent encounters with situations that are either unnecessarily complicated or, in extreme cases, become disasters simply because of my introversion and what better way to talk about them than through an anonymous blog?

So today I’m going to a gathering for doctors in New York. The whole thing has been causing me episodes of palpitation and sweating ever since I heard about it. I haven’t done much to further my career ever since I graduated. I’m not married and have no children. So basically I’m a 31 year old, single, medical graduate who is very likely to bump into younger, more accomplished doctors who I know from med school. Not just that, I will also be meeting people who are likely to look at me with shaking heads and I-feel-sorry-for-you eyes. Most importantly, there will be too many people! Aaaaargh! In all honesty, I’m not sure if it’s my bruised ego or my introversion that’s causing the physical symptoms. Probably a little bit of both.

So why subject myself to such discomfort you ask? Well I’m going to need to look around a possible new work location and meet people who might help me further along the career path. But I’m still terrified. Hopefully I can maintain an impassive face and plastic smile. Mostly, I hope I don’t meet anyone I know but knowing my luck I probably will. It’s silly I’m stressing over something so vain when there are people in the world starving, freezing, homeless…..no it’s not helping I’m still freakin out like it’s the end of the world. Welcome to my life as an introvert. Wish me luck!

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